So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
