How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
