Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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