true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize