If that was your dad, he is hot
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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