Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
worst night to have a conscience
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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