so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
the day after is always just damage control
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
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