I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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