Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
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Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
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I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
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