he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
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