Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
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downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
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Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
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