That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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