I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
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No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
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Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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