im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did angry sex become our thing?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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