I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize