hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
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