it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
