And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
