Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
