so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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