Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
