I've blown a few things in my day
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
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