just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.