It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
