she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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