She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
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i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
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And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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