i don't like sucking hair
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
