I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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