What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
