Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
