whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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