ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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