I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
