So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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