you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Randomize
