Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
COCAINE IS GR8
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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