I think I am morally bankrupt
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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