cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize