I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's never too late to be topless.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize