Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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