you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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