I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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