you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize