Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
