I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Life without a bra equals bliss.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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