...so i touched it.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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