Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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