I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize