we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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