No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
you would pick up someone in the library
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
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